Monday, September 22, 2008

Spread Around S'more of This Rare Talent

Man, I need to hook up with somebody making movies or something.

Screw this game crap, its too much work for everybody involved, its too much work to make the shit, its too much work to play the shit, and it don't pay enough.

Not when we could be having fun eating donuts on location and being creative while making something that was an hour and a half of fun to watch and eat donuts to and be done with it.

Something that was composed of short, cheetah-like bursts of energy, captured on film, something we could prepare ourselves for and execute over and over again, insteada some long-ass overly drawn-out endurance-test-of-a-thing where only the most exhausted shit manages to make it through the spanking machine and leave faint impressions on the tape.

Something that would matter more in the long run anyways by virtue of its sheer accessibility alone.

A television show would probably be better than making movies, movies are kinda bad for some of the same reasons games are bad, its the timing of the it, the pacing involved in the making and enjoyment of it, time is really the red-headed step child of dimensions, we're not real good at looking at it and understanding it yet, y'know, compared to length, width, and height, we're just barely starting to get our heads around the way things move through time, we like to look at stuff as snapshots, frozen in time, 'cause we get confused when all the parts start to move again, and it gets hard to measure things, and we get lost.

Movies are bad 'cause you got too much time to make 'em, and you don't gotta make as many of 'em, same as games.

But whatever, somebody's gotta be making a TV show that we could hook up with, and I don't mean something that's already famous, I don't wanna work on Battlestar Galactica or Stargate or any of that shit, I want something that we're free to give personality to, something we can bring to life any way we want without getting yelled at ahaha.

Oh, its probably just as bad as everything else, where some idiot execs from somewhere tell you that you oughta change the ending of the season finale and whatever, but there's a million ways to get around that kinda shit.

Yah, the only thing really bad about TV is the censorship stuff, when you automatically sorta tone yourself down and self-edit, but that can actually be a good thing sometimes, too, y'know, I could give examples, like the way the dude from Hill Street Blues mellowed out Lynch on Twin Peaks, and the result was better than the sum of the parts, there's an art to toning things down in places, its the big difference between Hitchcock and Tarantino, really, ain't it?

Y'know, those are the calm little avenues of shadowy accessibility for folks with more delicate sensibilities and your points of contrast amidst the hot and glaring splashes of technicolor zombie blood spatter sizzling on the pavement and the daisy duke hitchhiker climbing-into-the-VW-bus ass-shots in the orangey-orange sunshine.

Dude, somebody should get Tarantino to produce a TV show, and then hire me to help them eat the donuts and act as an advisor or something.

Yah, we can sell it to Showtime or some shit, pfft, those dudes will buy anything, juss lookit that Medieval piece of soft-porn shit they got and all the marketing behind it, I mean, seriously, could a show be a bigger waste of time and more boring than that?

I feel bad for the marketing geniuses that are wasting their lives and talent trying to prop pieces of crap like that up.

Y'know, how many times have you said to yourself, "man, the goddam commercials are better than this show, I wish the guys who were making these commercials would do a show!" ahaha.

I think the furniture is the most interesting thing on the Tudors, its like Antiques Road Show With Tits or something heh.

Oh whatever.

Seriously though, somebody get on that shit and hook us up!

Y'know, its like, wtf, I could write a season of Lost every day, there's all this "rare talent" that's just going to waste ahaha.

"Dude, I think you mighta painted yourself into a corner there, y'know, with the polar bear sequence."

"Pfft don't worry about it, I'm sure I'll figure it out eventually."

"Well, whatever, as long as this whole thing don't turn out to be some kinda stupid-ass dream, where the guy wakes up at the end and goes..."

"..."

Shit man, I could write a full season of a show about a bunch of guys making a show like Lost in a day ahaha.

And heck, Sundry could probably wrote two seasons worth of that kinda shit in a day AHAHA.

Yah man, we should all band together and create some kinda Creative Consulting Company.

All we really need is somebody specialized in creating Creative Consulting Companies, some kinda creative creative consulting company creative consultant guy from a creative consulting company creation consultation company or something.

Yah, I dunno how to do that shit, "I'm just a cheerleader" ahaha.

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