Friday, May 2, 2008

Monkhood

"Dude, you don't act like much of a monk."

"Yah, well, what the hell are you s'posed to be?"

"Nothing."

"Right, so stfu."

6 comments:

Sundry Chicken said...

Franciscan, Cappuccino, Jesuit, Electric, Bard's Tale... so many monks!!! So many Monkey. HEad hurt. Monk overload, commencing shutdown. Please proceed to the nearest emergency exit.

Ole Bald Angus the Monk said...

I dunno what all this monk crap is all about really.

I'm just wearing this robe 'cause I couldn't find me a pair of pants that weren't too tight in the crotch, y'know?

But then all the sudden everybody in town is coming up to me and asking me to solve murders and do autopsies and all this totally freaky stuff.

But then I find out that meals and drinks and lodgings are always on the house for the brothers in pretty much every land there is, 'cause there's all sorts of monks and they all look the same and they all talk the same kinda crazy junk that nobody understands and its bad luck with the gods to treat 'em bad!

And monks get tons of chicks, man, 'cause nobody suspects the Inquisition, and we don't wear pants.

And not only is it okay, its GOOD LUCK to kiss a monk, that's a Rule or something.

So I'm all like, wtf, aight, whatever, I'll just get all drunk off my ass and then all this gross-ass murder mystery stuff won't freak me the hell out so much, y'know?

And then I find out that these murder mystery thingies are goddam EASY to solve, 'cause the dude who did it is always the first guy you see, after you take a look at the corpse, who acts like a total asswipe to you, y'know?

So its a pretty sweet little gig, aside from the bit where you gotta go and take a peek at some dead people.

But truth is, I don't even really look anymore.

Yah, turns out that you don't really need to, fer the magic to work, y'know?

They just gotta THINK you did.

Sundry Chicken said...

Hot monk on monk action, that's why in the end it's better to ride off on your donkey and not look back, never look back.

Ole Bald Angus the Monk said...

No way man, the LAST thing you wanna do is ride off on some damn ass-breaking donkey once somebody fires up that monk-on-monk talk, that's the kinda thing that REALLY gets the ladies going, THAT party is just gettin' STARTED baby ahaha.

Sundry Chicken said...

Sad, I was off looking for this movie a few weeks ago for some reason. May have to break down and get a dvd of it.

Or their is tijuana.

Ole Bald Angus the Monk said...

Sad, I gotta go to my little brother's oldest son's communion tomorrow.

But it sorta fits this whole naughty thing 'cause its Irish Catholic heh.

I just live in total fear that the kid is gonna ask me something like "how many lies can you tell before you gotta go to hell?" and then he'll read my mind for my answer ahaha.

"Well I s'pose that all depends on how long you got before you gotta go to hell, right?"