Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Ex-bouncer Is Online

In real life, although we're both actually a lot a like like Terminator Robots or something as far as base systems go, I'm the artsy off-the-grid Big Lebowski guy, and Ex-bouncer is my John Goodman, totally, complete with yelling at all the Donnies and everything.

He sold his first Business when he was 18, so he's also like, my Smed, which sadly means that I'm much more of the Brad type, although I'm actually more like that evil monkey from the Golden Compass, and then Ex-b would be that evil hot chick, 'cept he ain't anything like a hot chick, he's more like a "thinking man's" John Goodman crossed with Curly from the Three Stooges.

Anyways I knew he would be totally into this user-content-web-mmorpg-LOLapalooza thingie, 'cause he's an old internet business guy and this is the kinda packaging that makes it easy for him to wield it in his mind and do stuff with it, compared to the average pegasus-crossing "let's get rich selling telescopes!" MMO game idea heh.

Its more like porn, y'know?

And he's done all that internet user community manager stuff before too.

So I'm telling him my idea on the phone and after I laid down the initial infrastructure of the idea he's all like, cutting in and guessing everything I'm gonna say five seconds ahead of time, so I know he's totally into it.

We went through the whole thing with User Ratings for content and how you could have filters that would allow you to only use content that had been approved by some group and/or select content based on other preferences, like whether you want it to be all medieval with pegasuses and stuff.

And then I got to that meta layer with the way it would allow kids in China and Russia and Africa and everywhere to add stuff to the game and learn our Drinking Games and stuff, and how that would totally be like, something good we could do for the world, sorta like Star Trek ahaha.

And you know how I said that 200k people for a buck a month is 10k a month per guy for a team of 20 or 5k a month per guy for a team of 40, and then you can swap out some of those people and use the money for servers and monthly contests and stuff?

He was all like, dude, you should donate at least one of those slots to charity.

And my brain turned over a sec and then it realized that I could be the most horrible guy in the universe with the most disgustingly random and awesome game ever and come out smelling like a superhero.

"A portion of all profits goes to world charities."

See, that is why I need to keep him around, none of you fuckers are looking out for me and the fate of the children of the world like that!

I can't help that I'm powered by a combination of reckless appetites and hedonistic energies and a total disregard for anything that ain't taboo to Aborgines, somebody needs to produce the goods, man, and that's the only way I know how to do it.

But as long as I got Ex-b around, I know that me and all the innocent children of the world won't be left for dead and that my power will be put to a good use heh.

And all you drag-asses are coming 'round here, scratchin' yourselves and being all like, "hey bro I need money for drugs" and stuff ahaha.

I'm on a mission from God.

Now he came over and we're all gonna get drunk talking about how we could try to get money out of Black&Decker for advertising a certain kinda Nailgun for my Nailgun Monkey.

'Cause this game has all that in-game advertising shit working for it in a big way heh.

Its like Andy Warhol Online with cans of Campbell Soup in the loot table and shit ahaha.

Dude, although the game doesn't have traditional MMOG crafting ('cause you can add your own photoshopped t-shirts and stuff to the loot tables directly to get rid of your jones for crafting armor, and add pictures of actual houses and buildings and stuff for player houses), you could have auction houses located in big cities like Chicago and an economic overlay that'll allow you to go around like a guy from a Frontier spacetrading game making money transporting commodities between places that consumed a certain amount of player-looted porn and cigarretes to increase morale and cans of Campbell Soup for food and Tight Levi's Jeans for mating rituals or something, y'know?

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