The Transparent Eye

There is an evil kind of nerdy, where a bunch of nerds get picked on by a bunch of evil cool kids, but they still wanna be evil cool kids, 'cause they're like, falling in love with their kidnappers or something, I dunno.

And then some of 'em want to be all dark and mysterious and cool and crap like Batman.

And then there's some of 'em that go around trying to make a big deal out of being "Intellectually Superior" or something, as if they could make up for some sort of hideous "Physical Inferiority" thingie by being snarky and unpleasant and hideous on some other level heh.

Is all this junk about getting laid and trying to get people to like you and stuff?

'Cause if that's the case, your shit is just getting all twisted around ass-backwards and going from suck to blow, man.

And that shit where somebody told you guys that being attractive is all about being an asshole or being confident or some shit?

Dude, whoever told you that shit was an idiot.

People don't like assholes and assholes-politely-disguised-as-confident people, dude, "people not liking you" is pretty much the definition of an asshole heh.

It ain't about that at all.

It just seems like that's what it is.

Here's what it really is.

The folks who don't need anything from anybody are attractive to folks who are needy.

'Cause it seems like the folks who don't need anything must have whatever it is that the folks who need something need.

Not that that actually does anything for the guy who really doesn't need anything from anybody, having some needy person latching on to you just weighs you down and makes shit worse, that's just like being chained to a dead guy or something.

Which perpetuates the myth that guys like us are "confident" and assholes or whatever, 'cause we're all like, please get the fuck off of me and shit ahaha.

And then there's needy people who need to be needed, and those folks actually hate us guys that don't need anything from anybody, 'cause we're the worst at giving them what they need, since we don't need 'em heh.

And there's also folks that are just plain self-destructive, too, and they'll latch on to whoever they think might be able to help them destroy themselves, so you gotta watch out for those, man.

And then there's folks that don't need anything from anybody that go around making things better for everybody.

Y'know, those guys that ain't afraid to look like a jackass to get everybody to laugh and dance and not worry about how they look and whatever the shit.

And those folks score bonus points with each other by making things better for everybody somehow, and then everybody else that doesn't need anything owes them some "making it better" back for it.

See how that "being cool" and "superiority" and "be an asshole" and "confidence" shit doesn't really come into the equation when you get to the end game?

'Cause all those things are like, predatory or needy, some kinda negative vibe emitters, or something, insteada the "no vibes being emitted" state of contentment, or emitting positive vibes, or whatever.

But don't try to go straight from being a twisted-up evil little dork to being a dork that emits positive vibes, its a lot harder and more dangerous than it looks, and people can tell right away if you are faking it, so you should just be happy if you can cut back on some of the fucked up shit you have loaded into your RAM at first heh.

Get that down to zero, learn how to meditate or something to center yourself so you can detect "micro changes in air density" and shit, become a transparent sheet of glass that lets everything flow through you, and you'll see what I'm talking about with all the needy folks.

And then you can start loading up some good stuff into your RAM, and see how that works for you.

Usually you only need a really small amount of the good stuff to make a huge amount of good stuff happen, its like making waves in a pool or something.

And then you'll have all these needy people latching on to you and weighing you down and shit, just like you wanted, and you'll be where I'm at, where needy people think you are a super-confident asshole or whatever, and all the animals follow you around and shit like that zippity-doo-dah guy, 'cause they can sense that you don't mean 'em any harm, 'cause there ain't nothing predatory and needy about you, or something.

This is why I don't get the whole self-esteem thing at all, my brain just short-circuits if I even try to think about that, I mean, I appreciate myself when I make myself laugh, or think of something that helps me or somebody I care about out somehow, but yer starting to get into crazy-talking-to-yourself-land if you even go that far, so its like you lose as many self-esteem points as you get heh.

Talk to the ones that are fun to talk to, and dance with the ones that are fun to dance with.

Don't make some huge castle in the air out of the shit and then start carrying that around with you and inviting people into it and get upset when they don't behave the way you wanted 'em to and all that garbage.

Just travel light, man.