If you've got questions about Jeff Freeman, you just go right ahead and ask them, and I'll answer them to the best of my ability in the order they arrive.
I'll start you off.
Question #1: "What does Jeff Freeman look like in Real Life?"
Answer: "Hmm, that's a good question, Questioner Number One, but I dunno, really. I suspect that he looks a lot like Chuck Norris, since all game developers tend to be some variation on the Chuck Norris Theme. He might look sorta like a taller, skinnier, dark-and-curly-haired Chuck Norris, without all the facial hair and muscles, and more rings under his eyes, sorta Goth, y'know, or a fat and jolly oriental wise-man Santa Claus version of Chuck Norris, with long-fingernails and a glass eye and a funny hat, but he's still a Chuck Norris."
Question #2: "Is Jeff Freeman related to Gordon Freeman?"
Answer: "Hmm, that's a good question, Questioner Number Two, man you guys are so frickin' smart and awesome and hot and sexy and stuff, I'm getting all flustered, I can hardly concentrate! What were we talking about? Ah yah, Gordon Freeman. Who the hell is this Jeff guy, anyways? Ah, you mean Little Jeffy Freeman, yah, he was like the Luigi of Super Mario Brothers, y'know, the "Narf Pinky" to Gordon's "Brain," in the Original Two Player Version of Half Life that got cut when they had to release the game before it was ready. Little Jeffy Freeman, running around in his orange contamination suit, stealing all the power-ups and falling into the lava and shit. Uh-oh, Little Jeffy throwed a grenade, Gordie!"
Question #3: "You are so smart and awesome and hot and sexy and stuff."
Answer: "Hmm, can you phrase that in the form of a question about Jeff Freeman?"
Question #3: "Ummm, nope."
Answer: "Well I think that's a damn good question anyways, Questioner Number Three. Okay, let's go to the phones."
Phone Question #1: "I think that *bleeeeep* hussy oughta *bleeeep* that *bleeep* good fer nuthin *bleeep* man of hers, she needs to get her *bleeeep* a *bleeeeeep* of a *bleeeeep* man, since that *bleeeeeeeeeeeeep* in her *bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeep* you know, it just ain't right."
Answer: "Hmm, that was a good question, Phone Questioner Number One, if I was all up in that action, I'd tell that *bleeep* of a *bleeep* and *bleeep* his *bleeep* can *bleeep* talk to the *bleeep* hand, know what I'm saying? You go girl! Alright, I think we're going to take a break, and then we'll be back with the next caller after these important words from our imaginary sponsor!"
Ole Bald Angus is personally calling you to the Matrix, even though he has no idea who you are and he hates the Ten Million Kinds of Eyebrows Lag, just like you thought he was personally calling you to SWG when him and Ex-bouncer were actually trying to get Triple A and Soccerman to play!
*bunch of bullet-time special effects and explosions with techno-music playing*
So drag your crazy head fulla shiz up the stairs and get your hard-working momma to give her credit card to some guy in Japan right now!
"Dancing Cowboy Strikeforce, OH YAHHHHHH!!!"
Alright we're back!