Thursday, March 6, 2008

U GOPT KILED ROFLS

So... anybody wanna play SWG with me?

C'mon, we'll have the whole place to ourselves!

I'll even let you drive the Obi Wan Space Station Wagon!

Or that newer version of it that tilts all crazy that only has one working brakelight!

Bet they haven't fixed that yet!

Wonder if they still have that Nude Bug?

Boy its hot out here in the desert of Tatooine.

Mind if I take my pants off?

My legs are all sweaty.

Don't worry, we all come equipped with tighty-whities in this game!

Heh heh heh heh heh.

Goddam, I wanna play some kinda non-sword-n-orc game but there ain't a lot to pick from.

There's the Matrix, but I done that as far as its gonna go.

And there's uh, Eve Online, but I don't wanna play a game where I gotta just sit around and wait for stuff, I wanna get somewhere when I play, y'know?

So that pretty much rules that one out, unless we can get the admins to give us the cheat codes or something, which is a distinct possibility heh.

And then there's that new Richard Garriot Tabernacle Rasta game, which seems kinda cool but it doesn't let you move your UI around yet because the Creepy King is too busy preparing to go into outer space for real to fix that kinda lame-n-earthly problem shit ahaha.

And they ain't got Mechs yet, just the Promise of Mechs.

Which is better than no-promise-at-all, which is what it seems like you get with that UI problem heh.

"OH MY GOD THIS GAME HAS SO MUCH POTENTIAL THERE'S HARDLY ANYTHING ELSE TO IT!!!"

I mean, seriously, how hard is something like that UI thing to fix?

Maybe an hour of work.

And that's if you are high on something when they ask you to do it heh.

That seriously doesn't bode well for my impression of the combined technical aptitude of The Team ahaha.

I bet it would be fun to play for a little bit anyways, though, y'know, the maps look really good, at least, it kinda reminds me of Autoassault, which really was a fun game, at least for a little while, even though it didn't look like it was gonna be.

And they got that Alphabet Soup Magic Puzzle game we could play in there that teaches you Richard Garriots Alien Language and gives you special powers that aren't anything like the Force from Star Wars *rolls his one good eye*

Prolly wouldn't cost us nothing either, they got some cutting-edge-game-dev-idea "friend-key" system, we'd just have to suck up and make some friends with people who actually bought that game, pfft, that's easy, those guys are prolly starved for friendship heh.

Welp, there goes that plan, sorry ahaha.

Let's see, what else is there.

Oh no you don't, nothing with that Anime shit innit, man, I gotta draw a line somewheres, I can't just have you drag me into some Bottomless Abyss of Suck where our hair turns blue and wavy and our eyes get all big and cute and we just fall into the Suck forever and ever and listen to lame philosophical stuff that makes about as much sense as the lyrics to a Def Leppard song or anything anybody said in the sequels to the Matrix while bunny ears grow on our heads ahaha.

Man, at least SWG has spaceships we can actually steer AHAHA.

Yah see, its like, if you like scifi, you are totally fuxxored as far as this MMO stuff goes, wut iz up wit dat!

How can there be guys that say stuff like "oh, that orc stuff is so lame."

What the hell game are they playing that doesn't suck worse than the million billion orc games?

I musta missed something.

Maybe they play City of Heroes, that was pretty fun, I mean, its not scifi, and it got boring about as quick as Autoassault, punching thugs out over and over again until blood came out of your eyes, but it was pretty fun.

Superjumping around on the buildings was really great, though.

Meh, I don't wanna do that again.

So c'mon everybody!

Let's play some SWG!

Or that Tubba Lava game!

Or let's get the admins of Eve to give us the cheat codes or whatever!

Or even Anarchy Online, with its weirdo graphics from 1982!

"Nice helmet!"

"thx!"

We just got so many options here ahaha.

Edit: Oh man, the Collector's Edition of Tumbler Rumbler is going for 14.99!

Dude, at that price, it isn't even worth it to go through all the crap you'd have to go through to make friends with somebody just to get one of those cutting-edge Friendship Keys for free heh.

Plus, the Authentic Scarf and Hand Painted Pencil Sharpener or whatever you'd get with that is prolly worth at least that much ahaha.

2 comments:

Sundry Chicken said...

You wait long enough everything comes back around. I'm burning time between builds at work with this german made civ clone... ikariam.net So far creating a puny trading empire and selling my resources at vastly inflated prices is a relaxing change from the cursing and whining of bg chat and pvp. Whatever, really my poor ssh tunnel from work lacks the bandwidth to support anything much more interactive than this.

Ole Bald Angus the Monk said...

Ach du lieber mike.

That reminds me that I need to go over to Germany and rescue all those super geniuses from that guy that only allows them to wear sweaters and build boring business related server emluation daemons and play games where they are only allowed to fight non-organic robots.

I also gotta go and check out Russia and Poland and figure out why all those awesome scifi dudes haven't built us any grim universe games where we can terraform poisonous infra red death jungle planets and hack our way through a horde of treacherous amazon pod people gladiatrixes at the cost our humanity because they were only trying to communicate with us and teach us about nature.

When you look at all the junk tiny little places like Finland and Iceland are doing you gotta wonder wtf is going on with the places you woulda EXPECTED to be kicking a lot of scifi ass already heh.