There Is No Try

So I made a fresh new commando guy in SWG and I played through the tutorial and that Tansarii Point Station thingie with all the quests and I was having fun blasting stuff and I even blew up my ship once and got knocked down a couple times heh.

And I was thinking, man, maybe I shouldn't have picked on SWG so much, this game is goddam fun.

And then I got beamed down to Tatooine.

And all the monsters for my newb quests were stuck in rocks or purple to me due to some kinda anti-exploit code that makes high level things spawn anywhere people are killing stuff too much.

Seriously, every single bottom-of-the-bin newbie monster at the waypoints for my newbie quests were either stuck in a rock or purple to me.

I'm talking about 30th level mongbats and kreetles, man!

That anti-exploit thingie probably seemed like a good idea at the time but I'm not sure who its supposed to be helping, definitely ain't me (the newb who needs to kill this crap) or the guy who was afk-macroing heh.

Was there a real problem with people killing womprats and newbie quest garbage around Tatooine because it was so much fun that it needed to be solved by only allowing the people who can kill the purple stuff to do it?

I don't ever remember that being a problem when things just respawned, y'know, like regular heh.

Well, whatever, I got in my hovercar and I drove around in the desert and I found other random spawns besides the ones listed in my quest.

And when I couldn't find anything I needed, even after driving out past the lag barrier produced by the event horizon of all the houses that encircle Mos Eisley like a gigantic maze of alleys, because some stuff doesn't spawn randomly, I went back to town and got missions for the things I needed to kill from the mission booths and finished my quests that way.

They give experience points for mission booth quests now, so that's cool, at least.

And there were tons of newbs and oldbies hanging around Mos Eisley too (which is why all my monsters were purple I guess, you bastards ahaha).

Its still exactly the same as it was as far as lag and monsters dying standing up and falling over without any animations and suddenly teleporting to your feet and all that good stuff heh.

So the jedi corpse crotch lightning gag is probably still completely intact ahaha.

And there's bugs, I had to relog on that newbie station once 'cause my quest guy wouldn't talk to me and so I launched into space and then the space station wouldn't talk to me heh.

And I crashed twice in the couple of hours I was playing (both of those times were when I was running past the starport in Mos Eisley for my quests so it probably has something to do with all the people around there).

That was kinda surprising, 'cause for all the stuff I seen in SWG, I don't think I ever crashed before heh.

But whatever, y'know, the game is fun, man.

What other game has a bunch of Elder Jedi squatting out in front of the starport with their glowie thingie activated as if they were meditating or something, just begging to get my newbie crotch stuck in their faces when I puts my hands on my hips and demand money from them heh.

Who's the newb now ahaha.

Any true oldbie would be smart enough to never sit down and get caught in a compromising screenshot like that AHAHA.

Oh don't worry I'm just kidding I always forget to take screesnhots when I'm enjoying myself.

Anyways it got me thinking that it would be awesome if all you guys came and stared at the monsters that were trapped in the rocks with me.

And its not just a misery loves company thingie, y'know?

I mean, you know there's no game that's as jam-packed with intestine-rupturing cartoon comedy as SWG.

When have you ever laughed that hard in a game.

SWG is totally the Plan 9 from Outer Space of MMOs, man.

And the people who take it all serious only make it even more funny.

But I don't blame 'em, y'know, 'cause SWG does have some parts innit that are totally awesome and that sucks you in only to set you up for the parts where you crash on the laggy rocks with all the cardboard monsters stuck in 'em, I've fallen for that "getting my hopes up aww wtf" rollercoaster shit plenty of times myself heh.

I mean, if you look at it like an Ed Wood Show that is brilliant every once in a while on accident or mebbe an evil circus where they torture all your favorite animals to death to entertain you then it won't bother you so much ahaha.