Curses

It must really suck to be one of those musicians that nobody likes except for little kids.

I mean, even if you somehow convince yourself that you're okay with your lot in life somehow, that all your dancing around and cool moves and song-writing is something that only little kids will listen to, you're still gonna eventually hit that part when the little kids do a review of your performance and say stuff like "it wasn't one of his better performances" or "he didn't really seem like he was putting his heart into it."

Which little kids are bound to do heh.

See, if I really was a wizard, I'd cast that as a curse on somebody ahaha.

I kinda got a curse like that, with the animals following me around 'cause they know I don't mean 'em any harm.

I mean, I can even scream and yell "get the fuck out of here!" at them and all the chipmunks and squirrels and woodpeckers and shit just sit there and laugh and say stuff to each other like "oh he's such a kidder!"

Its a little infuriating, but unfortunately its not infuriating enough to make the small furry animals scared of what I might do heh.

Yah, at first you might think something like that is a cool super power, and I have to admit that it comes in handy every once in a long while, but for the most part is just super annoying and creepy.

'Cause you gotta really think about what it'd be like, if, when everybody else leaves, all the animals close in on you, or just ignore you completely and act as if you weren't there, 'cause they're only programmed to notice shit that's a potential threat.

And you might think you like animals, now, y'know, but when they all start liking you too much, you won't end up liking 'em back so much.

Yesterday a gang of stupid ass woodpeckers woke me up at five in the morning by pecking on my goddam window and I had to go outside and yell at 'em for a couple minutes before they moved on.

And I'm a kinda scary guy in real life, at least with humans, I got a "bad guy face" or something, and "excitable" people who don't really know me all that well have nightmares about me and everything, I'm never gonna get used to this shit where some critter just stares back at me when I give an actual order heh.

See, some goddam wizard cursed my ass but good.

Still, I think I'd rather have the animal curse than the little kid one or some other kinda human one, y'know, I s'pose getting woken up by a bunch of humans pecking on your window at five in the morning would be way the hell worse ahaha.