Thursday, May 24, 2007

Bread and Butter

So I'm reading the Fellowship of the Ring again.

And like all the writings of guys that were cool kids in their day, like Shakespeare and the Moby Dick Guy, its a slow read, y'know, to catch all the little whip cracks and slick drifts, to isolate the well springs of future thoughts and their influences, you gotta compare it to what was going on in the brain of a regular guy of their day and all that crap.

Yah, I used to say that Tolkien was the Definition of Ponderous when I was younger, but he's actually not even half as ponderous (or hilarious) as the Moby Dick Guy.

Anyways, no matter what kinda ghouls and junk are eating at them, these damn hobbits stop like every five minutes and have a feast in that book, man.

There's almost as much eating going on in there as there is in the Sopranos.

"And then Frodo and his stalwart companions ate a delicious selection of Pastries with Assorted Colorful Spinkles On Top, and it was like a starving man biting in to a loaf of fresh white bread, and there was much pancakes and bacon, crips and sizzling in the maple syrup, and the wine was flowing golden, like honey, and refreshing..."

So, y'know, I had to go shopping and buy tons of bread and cheeses and cranberry juice and stuff 'cause the stupid book was makin' me all hungry and frickin' jealous heh.

Yah, I ain't got very far in the book yet but man I'm starting to get pretty damn fat in real life ahaha.


Almagill said...

And why did they stop to eat so much?

What was the hobbits other vice? Aye, smoking. Smoking the 'home grown tobacco'.

Yeah, you hang out with a wizard, smoke your own wacky backy and think there's a giant lidless eye watching you while a half dead hundreds of years old psychopath is stalking you... sure Frodo, sure.

Ole Bald Angus the Monk said...

"Git that cigarette outta yer mouth! You wanna stunt yer growth?"

"Aw cripes I'm six foot four and two hundred and fifty pounds, ma."